Have you ever felt like there is no one you can trust? Or like you’re looking over your shoulder? Have you ever felt betrayed or stabbed in the back?
I was recently involved in a scenario that assumed trust on my part: trust that the principals I was dealing with were going to be honest and ethical with me. Unfortunately, the situation did not play out as I had hoped and I have since pieced together bits and pieces of information from other players that have made me feel betrayed. It has also caused me to feel like I was played for the fool, because of my willingness to be so trusting. This has resurrected old scars from previous situations and “betrayals” and reinforced my cynicism and feelings of low value and worth within the organization where this happened.
During the time that all this was happening, which has been several months, I’ve been trying to read a chapter of Proverbs every day. I’ve also copied several verses onto index cards, to create a sort of “flash card” set of favorite verses that are reminders of God’s faithfulness, provision, and protection. Old favorites like Romans 8:28–“We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” And Philippians 4:6-7–“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God…will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” As well as some new “favorites” like Hebrews 13:6–“So we say with confidence, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?‘” And Isaiah 41:9-10–“[God says], ‘You are my servant’; I have chosen you and not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
As I was wrestling with my feelings of betrayal and worrying that there was really no one I could trust in that situation, and worrying about the impact on my future dealings with them, and praying to God to help me and deliver me, I finally heard his voice. Through all of the Scriptures I had been reading and meditating on, upon asking myself for the umpteenth time who I could trust, I finally heard God tell me, “Don’t worry about who you can or can’t trust–just trust ME. Just be obedient; just be faithful; and just trust Me. They can’t touch you, they can’t hurt you; I’ve allowed this to happen at this time, in this way, because I love you. I’ve got your back, so just trust Me.” It hit me like a ton of bricks, like one of those “I could’ve had a V8” forehead slaps, and at the same time, my worry about the situation, my worry about future dealings with these people, melted away. The burden that was lifted was tangible.
Reflecting on these verses since his revelation to me, it’s amazing to see the theme of trust running through all of them, and in fact, throughout the Bible. It’s a perfect example of something that was hiding in plain sight.